9 Tourist Traps that will make you say "I stopped for this?"

posted by Denis -

The Golden Gate Bridge

The Golden Gate Bridge It’s foggy up there. And cold from the wind and loud from the cars. The ubiquitous suicide call boxes don’t lighten the mood, either.

The Empire State Building Observation Deck

You can’t really see Central Park from the top, because that other building called 30 Rock is in the way. You also can’t see New York’s other greatest landmark — the Empire State Building — because you’re, well, inside the Empire State Building.

The Hollywood Walk of Fame

If getting accosted by meth addicts in Sesame Street costumes and hustled by dudes selling bootleg DVDs is a price you're willing to pay to see Cuba Gooding, Jr.'s footprint in a slab of concrete, then by all means, visit the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

Seattle Space Needle

Seattle, WA Seemingly designed to separate tourists from their money, visitors to the Seattle Space Needle pay around $20 dollars for a 41-second ride in a crowded elevator and four-minutes of foggy, rain-obstructed views from 520ft above the city.

 


Niagara Falls

First, you will pay tons of money to sleep in a motel simply because it’s within a 10-mile radius of this waterfall. Then, you will navigate a labyrinth of casinos and Hard Rock Cafes and Guinness World Records Museums on your way to the waterfall. Then, after purchasing a souvenir poncho, you will see the waterfall.

The Four Corners

Shiprock, NM (and CO, UT, AZ) The idea of being in four states at once sure does sound cool, even when the "Look at me playing Twister" poses aren't. This attraction off a dirt road in the middle of a sweltering desert is, literally, a granite/brass disk the size of a CD that's stuck to the ground. That’s it. To add insult to injury, it's allegedly stuck in the wrong spot, at least 1,800ft from the real deal.

Roswell

Roswell, NM You know those weird theme parks you went to as a kid? Where there weren't any rides, just stiff animatronics, layers of dust, and cheap, creepy looking dolls that gave you nightmares? Well, the whole town of Roswell, allegedly the site of an alien crash landing in 1947, is just like that. Anything that can be covered in or shaped like an alien is. It's weird, and creepy, and not worth your time. Even if the X-Files is still your favorite TV show of all time.

Mount Rushmore It’s even tinier than the picture in your history book. 


Epcot

Buena Vista, FL With a name that stands for Experimental Prototype Community of Tomorrow, Epcot Center was Walt Disney’s futuristic concept for changing the way humans lived. Today, 11.2 million visitors a year come here to marvel at stereotypes of people from 11 different countries, without ever leaving the US.

 

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Denis Davis

Denis Davis

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